Blog2020-03-22T12:45:01-07:00

Trauma & Attachment Therapy

The “I Love You” Exercise

August 15th, 2020|Uncategorized|

I’ve been utilizing an old Sufi practice, taught to me by Jamal Ramah, as a basis for a daily exercise for myself and my clients. The original exercise starts like this: “Cross your hands over your heart, and say to your heart, ‘I Love You.’ Let the love and light

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Clinical Issues in the Coronavirus Pandemic

March 16th, 2020|Uncategorized|

Everyone in Seattle is going through the formal stages of grief. All have some anxiety and some of them are panicking. What are the stages? Elizabeth Kubler-Ross lists them as  Shock and Disbelief: our vibrant city is dead. No traffic. No restaurants or bars or hair salons or schools or

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Breathing Ooouuuttt to Create Calm

January 7th, 2020|Anxiety disorders, Vagus nerve|

38 years ago, when I did my first meditation retreat with Stephen Levine, we would do long OMs at the start of many other kinds of practice.  Last night, 35 years after my last class, I started another meditation class, this time with Jamal Rahman, a Sufi teacher. With each

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Interesting 45-minute documentary of DID woman who got her father put in jail.

June 1st, 2019|Abuse, DID/MPD, Ego State Therapy, Multiple Personality Disorder, Psychotherapy in the media, Rape|

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lsXFcbPbvI4 Interesting, somewhat sensationalized, video from the Australian 60 Minutes show, about a woman who went to the cops and won in court. The story is brutal, as is often the case for people with massive dissociation. The outcome is lovely. Check it out!

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Online 2-Day Class of Easy Ego State Interventions

May 18th, 2019|Ego State Therapy|

Hello, I'm going to be in Massachusetts on June 14 -15 teaching my ego state class. If you want to live-stream it (or show up for it) go to this website to sign up: http://www.markinickerson.com/registration/?action=evregister&event_id=127 Here's the program description: Participants in Easy Ego State Interventions learn how to see clients

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Problems with Dear Evan Hansen

January 29th, 2019|Anxiety disorders, Cognitive Behavior Therapy|

Last night, I saw Dear Evan Hansen, the musical about an anxious, shame-filled high school senior. The play deals with broken families, suicide, OCD, social anxiety, and attachment. The music and the singing in this touring production was fantastic. I cried several times, and laughed a few. Still I was

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Australian Prime Minister Apologizes to Sexual and Ritual Abuse Survivors!

December 3rd, 2018|Abuse, Sex Abuse, Suicide, Trauma|

Here is a link to speech by Scott Morrison, the Prime Minister of Australia, from 11/25/2018, apologizing for his society's lack of support for and belief of sexual and ritual and institutional abuse survivors. I would like to see every leader of every country make this speech. For the video:

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Easy Ego State Intervention Workshops

April 16th, 2018|Books, Chronic Pain, Couples Therapy, DID/MPD, Dissociation, Ego State Therapy, EMDR Training, Generational Trauma, GVHD: Graft vs Host Disease, Marriage, Multiple Personality Disorder, Polyvagal Theory, psychotherapy, Sex Abuse, Sex Therapy, Structural Dissociation, Suicide, Trauma|

Dear Readers, Ego state work has been around since before Freud, and in latter years, has been the main stay of many practices. Interventions can range from "How old did you feel when you were yelling at your wife?" to "Let's identify those dissociative states that take over your body."

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Grieving the Loss of a Child

October 5th, 2017|Grief|

A participant in an overseas workshop sent an email request:  "A patient of mine, a woman in her 80's, lo"st her son at the beginning of the year. She already took antidepressant drugs, but at the moment she no longer does. However, she still feels deeply sad. What are your

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Differentiation and Integration in The Big Sick, Fun Home, and Trumpet

July 15th, 2017|Differentiation, Ego State Therapy, Gay, Homosexuality, Marriage, psychotherapy, Psychotherapy in the media, Sex in the Media|

    In the last three days I've had the pleasure of watching the fabulous movie, The Big Sick, the incredible musical Fun Home, and reading Trumpet, A Novel. All three are great art. The first two are based on the writers' lives. All are about "coming out", or not, to one's

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Volk Decision: Washington State Therapists Now Liable for Violent Acts of Former Clients!

April 2nd, 2017|Business of Psychotherapy, Legal Issues, Mental Health Policy, Suicide, Violence|

This is from Laura Groshong, the lobbyist of the Washington State Coalition of Mental Health Professionals and Consumers. I'm appalled by this decision and that we are now liable for every client we have ever seen! Changes to Practice of Mental Health Clinicians Based on Volk Decision April, 2017 Laura

Caring for Our Clients and Ourselves in the New Political Landscape

March 26th, 2017|Abuse|

Two weeks ago, I gave a workshop for forty Seattle-area psychotherapists about getting their clients and themselves through the new political situation. People spoke about their fears, their clients' distress, and specific issues that have come up in therapy.( Steal all that you want, but give me credit, if you

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Healing MCS and Graft vs. Host Disease

September 18th, 2016|Ego State Therapy, EMDR, GVHD: Graft vs Host Disease|

MULTIPLE CHEMICAL SENSITIVITY CASE On Friday and Saturday I gave a workshop about combining EMDR and Ego State Therapy. At the workshop, I did a demonstration with an attendee who was 8 months out from a horrible allergic reaction to crab meat. Since then she's had daily hives, breathing issues,

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Treating Racial Violence and Harassment in the Trump Era

August 2nd, 2016|Uncategorized|

In mid-June, a woman with a young son returned to the park-and-ride in a suburban Seattle town. On the car was a note: "Kill all Niggers! I'm gonna kill you the next time I see you. KILL KILL KILL. KILL OBAMA." The woman called her white husband, who told her

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Update and New Workshop

July 30th, 2016|CIMBS, Ego State Therapy, Suicide, Writing|

Dear Readers, (It appears that the many links in this post aren't working. You're going to have to drag and drop into your browser if you want to see anything online. Sorry!) It's been a busy year since I've posted anything. I blame Facebook and work in many other areas.

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Breathing Ooouuuttt to Create Calm

January 19th, 2016|Creative, News|

38 years ago, when I did my first meditation retreat with Stephen Levine, we would do long OMs at the start of many other kinds of practice.  Last night, 35 years after my last class, I started another meditation class, this time with Jamal Rahman, a Sufi teacher. With

Interesting 45-minute documentary of DID woman who got her father put in jail

January 19th, 2016|Design, Web Design|

Interesting, somewhat sensationalized, video from the Australian 60 Minutes show, about a woman who went to the cops and won in court. The story is brutal, as is often the case for people with massive dissociation. The outcome is lovely. Check it out! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lsXFcbPbvI4

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Online 2-Day Class of Easy Ego State Interventions

January 19th, 2016|News, Web Design|

Hello, I'm going to be in Massachusetts on June 14 -15 teaching my ego state class. If you want to live-stream it (or show up for it) go to this website to sign up: http://www.markinickerson.com/registration/?action=evregister&event_id=127 Here's the program description: Participants in Easy Ego State Interventions learn how to see

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“Love and Mercy”

July 5th, 2015|Psychotherapy in the media|

I just saw the bio-pic about Brian Wilson's (of the Beach Boys) genius, decline, and fall into the hands of a sociopathic psychiatrist, who became his legal guardian.  It's a good movie and a hard one to watch, especially for a therapist. Wilson is portrayed as a genius by Paul

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The Science of Inside Out

July 5th, 2015|Affect, Science|

I'm done with writing books, after finishing Easy Ego State Interventions last week, and going to the movies. Here's my favorite movie this week: Inside Out is a Pixar's delightful film about the inside of 11-year-old Riley's brain. Riley has just been dragged from her beloved Minnesota, house, school, and hockey team

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Theodicy: Spiritual Views of Evil and Abuse That Help or Impede Healing

September 20th, 2014|Abuse, Evil, Religion/Spirituality|

This article arose from a discussion on listserve that deals with clients who have suffered unspeakable abuse and torture. Rev. Lynn James wrote a wonderful response on the subject of Theodicy: Spirtuality, Evil, and Suffering, that is the best thing I've seen on the subject.  She expanded it for Ellen Lacter's

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Steps To Take When You Suspect A Family Member Is A Victim of Abuse

October 24th, 2013|Abuse|

Written by Josh Anderson One in four women has experienced domestic abuse at some point in their life, according to statistics from The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and The National Institute of Justice. While not all abuse is physically apparent at first, over time signs of abuse become

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Roy Kiessling’s Belief Schema Perspective for EMDR

October 14th, 2013|EMDR, EMDR Training|

Roy Kiessling, a prolific EMDR trainer and innovator, has come up with a great idea for EMDR. Instead of coming up with a different negative and positive cognition on the fly, right before processing, find the general negative belief or beliefs that underlie the client's life during the first stages

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Why I love EMDR!

August 22nd, 2013|EMDR, Trauma|

A friend of mine was home when her house was broken into last night. She got away, and the cops found the guy and arrested him. She posted the whole story on Facebook this morning. This afternoon, she posted this. I have her permission to repost. Please don't mention her

Trauma is Curable: My letter to the NYTimes

August 9th, 2013|Brainspotting, EMDR, Grief, Trauma|

When I read Mark Epstein's op-ed "The Trauma that Life Brings" in the 8/3/13 New York Times, I had to reply. Epstein, a psychiatrist said that trauma and grief are inevitable and that there's nothing to do about them but wait it out and suffer. I like that he was normalizing

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Installing the Future

April 26th, 2013|Brainspotting, Daniel Siegel, DID/MPD, Dissociation, Ego State Therapy, EMDR, psychotherapy|

Dissociative people often lack coherent narratives of their pasts (Mary Main & Dan Siegel). I'm finding that they often lack coherent visions of their futures. Today I "installed the future" in a formerly dissociative client, who has given me permission to tell this story.  When "Linda" was 6 weeks old,

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CPT Codes: Professionals Only

February 7th, 2013|Uncategorized|

"Here's the latest about the CPT codes from NASW. I'm so glad I haven't tried to bill yet: ***ALERT CPT Code Snag***   The use of the new Psychotherapy Codes became effective on January 1, 2013.  However, many Social Workers have encountered problems in being paid under the new codes.  The

Defining Rape and Sexual Assault

August 23rd, 2012|Abuse, Dissociation, Ego State Therapy, EMDR, Psychiatric diagnoses, Psychotherapy in the media, PTSD, Rape, Rape in the military, Sex Abuse, Sexual Assault, Shame|

I've been working with survivors of rape and sexual assault since I started in the mental health field. Here are my definitions: Rape: The sexual use, involving penile, digital (fingers) or objects on a woman's, man's or child's body without that person's consent, with forced consent (threats) or if that

Psychotherapy Works! And Not Enough People Use It.

August 19th, 2012|Business of Psychotherapy, Medicine and Psychology, psychotherapy, Psychotherapy in the media, Psychotherapy Marketing|

According to a meta-analysis of over 50 studies, psychotherapy works better than medication and (Suprise!) has less side effects. Drugs have better promotion and are easier to get, so more people use meds. Read about it here: http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2012/08/120809190641.htm

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How Not to Get Referrals

August 9th, 2012|Business of Psychotherapy, Technology and Psychotherapy|

Mike Langlois explains "How to Get Taken Seriously as a Mental Health Professional" in a mild rant about the uses and misuses of LinkedIn, etc. at  http://gamertherapist.com/blog/2012/08/08/how-to-get-taken-seriously-as-a-mental-health-professional/ I get a referral a day from my website and many consultees from this blog. I tell other therapists, "If you want any

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Stalkers: Classification and Treatment

June 29th, 2012|Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder, Psychopathy, psychotherapy, Stalkers, Weblogs|

Stephanie Rhys wrote a helpful article about Stalkers on Robert Muller's fantastic Trauma and Attachment Report blog right here: http://trauma.blog.yorku.ca/2012/06/29/in-the-mind-of-a-stalker/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+trauma-report+%28The+Trauma+and+Attachment+Report%29

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Research: CBT FAIL!

June 19th, 2012|Anxiety disorders, Cognitive Behavior Therapy, Empirically-based treatment, Professional Ethics, Pschotherapy websites, Psychiatric diagnoses, Psychotherapy Research|

Huge study in Sweden finds that CBT often doesn't work on anxiety and depression and can make the problems much worse:  REVOLUTION IN SWEDISH MENTAL HEALTH PRACTICE: THE COGNITIVE BEHAVIORAL THERAPY MONOPOLY GIVES WAY Please don't flame me, I'm just reporting the study.

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Lessons from a Dying Cat

June 2nd, 2012|Uncategorized|

Lila, our 18-year-old long-haired cat had a message for us all about how to live one's last day, so I let her ghost-write this post. 1. Try to keep a normal schedule.2. Stay hydrated.3. Connect with the people you love.4. Accept help: it's nice to have someone else brush your

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